if u can’t handle me at my hardcore feminist then u can’t have me at literally any other time bc that’s all i am 24/7
Why do we value the lives of men over women? These cases show how much more concerned we are with the ‘ruined lives’ of these men, than the lives of their victims. We express concern about men’s ruined lives – while carefully ignoring the fact that it was their actions that caused this so-called ‘ruin’. We bend ourselves backwards trying to accommodate violent men, trying to make sure rapists and killers are ‘okay’, trying to make sure the crimes they committed don’t continue to impact on them. We feel embarrassed if we mention the crimes. We keep quiet about how they brought the ‘ruin’ on themselves. We tread carefully, so they don’t have to feel bad about what they did.
And we don’t care about the impact of their actions on the lives of the women. We don’t care about how rape impacts on a woman’s life – how it can lead to PTSD, and physical and mental health complications. We don’t want to hear about how women’s lives are ruined by the actions of violent men. We don’t want to think about Reeva Steenkamp, when we buy Pistorius’ memoir. We don’t want to think about Evans’ victim, when he scores that winning goal. So we just conveniently take them out of the narrative.
After all, it doesn’t matter if women’s lives are ruined by violent men, does it? It doesn’t matter that it happens every day. The Evans and Pistorius cases show that what matters to our society most is the fallen abuser. It’s more important to us that the violent man can have his life back.
I’m not having it. I can’t stay silent. I can’t join in with the pretence that these men’s lives are ruined. I can’t ignore their victims.
So just remember this: Pistorius’ life wasn’t ruined; Reeva Steenkamp’s life was ended. Ched Evans’ life wasn’t ruined; Ched Evans is a rapist."